From
this isolated experience, however, I became more careful about
how I spoke on campus. I made a conscious effort to de-yooper-ize
my accent by trying not to elongate my vowel sounds. I tried to
listen to and imitate how students from downstate talked, in particular.
It was a totally foreign concept to me to be ridiculed or thought
of as stupid: throughout my entire life, people had always been
proud of me and of my accomplishments. I tried not to sound like
a yooper on campus because I had become aware that some people
thought I sounded uneducated or stupid because of the way I spoke.
I wanted to fit in here at MTU.
Though
this change may have helped me to fit in on campus, it began to
alienate me at home. As I started to tone down my yooper accent
on campus, it became a habit and my parents thought I sounded
funny when I went home. It was almost as though I had to become
two different people, the school Beth and the home Beth. At school
I was supposed to fit in with the crowd, which meant changing
how I had always acted, like refraining from using my yooper dialect.
At home I was supposed to be the same person my family and friends
had always known, but they didnt realize how much college
could change a person and they werent very accepting of
how I had changed. I was really beginning to hate itI fit
in a little more at school, but a lot less at home! It was the
ultimate catch-22.
It
was at the end of my freshman year that I finally decided that
I couldnt possibly please everybody. I started to do things
more for myself than for anybody else. I found an apartment for
the next school year with a few girls from my hall in the dorms,
and I stayed in Houghton for the first half of the summer to take
a couple of classes. After I spent the rest of my summer working
at Tulppos and hanging out with my friends at home, I was
ready to start school again, this time with my new attitude.
I
wanted to become more involved and respected on campus and I also
wanted to find a part-time job in Houghton so I wouldnt
have to go home to work. I solved both of these problems by applying
for and getting hired as a writing
center coach. Becoming a writing coach was a great way for
me to take on some added responsibility, similar to my high school
involvement in student government. I was able to use my academic
experi
ence
to help students with their writing. More important to me, I was
able to use my experiences at Tech to understand how the first-year
students I worked with were feeling and to try to help them to
adjust to life here at Tech. I just wanted to feel more involved
and needed on campus. I did not want to be just another face in
the crowd anymore. I also became very close friends with my new
roommates, especially Angie, who is also from the U.P. It was
really great to be able to talk to somebody who was going through
the same things as I was! We ended up becoming great friends and
finding all kinds of fun things to do. We would go out to grab
lunch or dinner, go to parties, go to movies, or just hang out
at our apartment. It was more comfortable to me, like a glorified
reproduction of my great high school years. I had found my niche
on campus, with my involvement in the writing center and my newfound
balance between friends and studying.