PANK
In Contemplation of this Body
by S. Whitney Holmes




these tiny breasts, this curve,
this coil of dark hair.

My boyfriend draws a finger
down my side, and sighs.

Buttons, he says. Buttons, pressing
his index finger into my nipple

and letting go, watching it recover,
resilient and automatic.

            (I’m thinking about my friend Morgan—and when she
                        publishes it, pretend I never gave it away—
                        who is writing a book of insignificant super powers,
                        one being the ability to regenerate
                        your nipples in the unlikely event they are ever cut off.
                        It could be useful
                        if we found a way to send them flying
                        through the air, erect, two ninja stars.)

Nothing, he says. Nothing
happens. Your buttons are broken.

            (I’m thinking about Anne Boleyn,
                        her failure to produce—
                        like a faulty machine—
                        a boy. But what’s so
                        important about a boy?)
   
I press his nipples, smaller, darker
buttons. Nothing, I tell him back.

Silly girl, he says, mine
are just nipples; yours are the buttons.

            (I can’t stop thinking how much
                        depended on her body,
                        its failure her execution.
                        I want my response
                        to be with this body.
                        I don’t know what it has
                        to do with being
                        a girl, exactly, but there’s
                        something there. If only
                        she could have regenerated
                        a head.)

I want this                         to be a love poem.

His finger pressing, softly,
nothing, nothing, nothing.




Ms. Holmes is pursuing an MFA at the University of Alabama. She is the poetry editor of Black Warrior Review and her poems appear or are forthcoming in Pebble Lake Review and The Journal.


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